Revolving Doors
It is often said of life that when one door closes, another opens. I'd like to think this is the case, or that there is some sort of "karmic" revolving door in life at least.
I didn't know it would bother me when my sister and niece drove off today, heading back for S.GA., after living up here in NW GA five minutes from me for I think five years now. I really didn't know it would hurt. But it does. I walked around Kroger grocery shopping like someone in a daze, flipping through memories of times together as I stumbled about.
There were a lot of bad memories made, sad, stressful, straining my patience, compassion, and understanding to their breaking points. There were physical injuries, sickness, and very deep emotional holes, that I witnessed during this time. And on one hand I *know* this is what is needed for my sister, I know that she must get away from the man who has brought her down for so many years -- almost 10 in fact. It's good that a separation has taken place. I'm thrilled in fact. I hope she can stay away from him, and heal herself on all levels, get her feet back underneath her, learn to laugh, love herself, love life again. Figure out who she is now, and where she wants to go from here in life. I'm hopefuly that her daughter will also learn to seize this new opportunity as a beautiful new beginning, and make better choices from here.
But you know, it hurt. Even though I have my husband and son here who I adore, and his family, and many good friends --- I have none of my family here now. And I really wasn't expecting it to hurt so badly. I feel like I have a aching hole in my heart at the moment. I am so hopeful that one day we too can move down there, to the land I grew up on, closer to my parents and all of my siblings. Maybe we can have an easier, quieter, less stressful life there if we do.
So, whether or not doors truly close and allow another one to open remains to be seen -- or decided upon by the individual traveler through life. I somehow like to think of it all as more of a revolving door, one that we sweep around and through at random times, fluidly. Hmmmm. I'll have to think more on that now.
I didn't know it would bother me when my sister and niece drove off today, heading back for S.GA., after living up here in NW GA five minutes from me for I think five years now. I really didn't know it would hurt. But it does. I walked around Kroger grocery shopping like someone in a daze, flipping through memories of times together as I stumbled about.
There were a lot of bad memories made, sad, stressful, straining my patience, compassion, and understanding to their breaking points. There were physical injuries, sickness, and very deep emotional holes, that I witnessed during this time. And on one hand I *know* this is what is needed for my sister, I know that she must get away from the man who has brought her down for so many years -- almost 10 in fact. It's good that a separation has taken place. I'm thrilled in fact. I hope she can stay away from him, and heal herself on all levels, get her feet back underneath her, learn to laugh, love herself, love life again. Figure out who she is now, and where she wants to go from here in life. I'm hopefuly that her daughter will also learn to seize this new opportunity as a beautiful new beginning, and make better choices from here.
But you know, it hurt. Even though I have my husband and son here who I adore, and his family, and many good friends --- I have none of my family here now. And I really wasn't expecting it to hurt so badly. I feel like I have a aching hole in my heart at the moment. I am so hopeful that one day we too can move down there, to the land I grew up on, closer to my parents and all of my siblings. Maybe we can have an easier, quieter, less stressful life there if we do.
So, whether or not doors truly close and allow another one to open remains to be seen -- or decided upon by the individual traveler through life. I somehow like to think of it all as more of a revolving door, one that we sweep around and through at random times, fluidly. Hmmmm. I'll have to think more on that now.
posted by Kestrel | 4:34 PM
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